Friday 6 February 2015

On Failing Gym and Aiming at Armpits*

*Press Sample
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It may come as a shock to you but it is actually possible to fail gym class. My elementary school report cards are all the evidence I'd need to prove this point; you will literally see an "F" next to Physical Education. Paint me a picture of youth-aged PE and I'll paint you a picture of me struggling along and really hating life.


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Back then, I was pathetically inadequate at any form of physical exertion. I mostly always came in last during a run, I never was able to reach any of the Prescribed Learning Outcomes for any of the sport units and my proudest moment was almost, but still not quite, making time in a 100m sprint.
My life has certainly changed since then and the gym has become a ritualistic part of my life. Yet there are some things I still haven't gotten a handle on.

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Take for instance, aim, the purposeful projection of an object towards a desired target. Yea, still haven't gotten that down yet. So you can understand why each morning I laugh at myself a little while I use the Dove Dry Spray Deodorant*. Delivered in an spray can, the deodorant instantly dries when sprayed and is supposed to protect you up to 48hrs. A can is supposed to last 8 weeks but with my constantly poor aim (I`ve been more likely to deposit the deodorant onto my boobs than onto my pits). the bottle just might last me a little less.

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You'd think that having an armpit target of barely 6 inches away from the can would be absolutely un-missable. But you'd find yourself sorely remiss; thank you for believing in me though. The deodorant itself works great, I still smell fresh after a long work out at the gym and it does truly apply dry, but the entire utility of its convenience is lost on me. Still, its been a fun little experiment and I can see how this might appeal to a number of people but I might go back to the regular solids afterwards.

How good is your aim?

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